Fear of Away

So there have always been two things I have always feared, fears that I’ve acknowledged since I’ve had the sense of reason and memory. These things are death and failure. Today during lunch I found out that one of the French exchange students at our school just had her grandfather pass away. She is of course devastated about it. Understandable. Her experience has tapped into a fear that has developed in me since I first arrived to South Korea: I won’t be there if an emergency were to present itself. I’m currently “knocking on wood” in hopes that nothing bad happens to the people I love. That is honestly the only thing that didn’t sit well with me when I came here, the “What if?”

But I will say that this has been my only concern during my time here (well the only concern of massive proportions). So stay safe, only go when the light turns green, put on your seatbelt, load up on Emegen-C’s and don’t break a bone.

Beautiful in Los Angeles

Have you heard this song by Garrison Star called “Beautiful in Los Angeles”? The temperature is beginning to shift here in South Korea, and it seems that it came just in time as it was perfect during my Chuseok break (Korean Thanksgiving). Well fall is here and before long winter will be here, and as my friend Nancy says, “The holidays are upon us.” But just like the song says about the beauty in LA, and based on what I’ve read from my LA friends’ status updates, it is about one hundred degrees back home (no exaggeration).

I’ve visited other places in the winter time: Mexico, Guatemala, Las Vegas, Big Bear, Lake Arrowhead, and others I’m sure I cannot recall at the moment. But this will be the first time I actually live through an entire season away from So Cal. It’s not just going somewhere for a weekend or a week, this will be weeks and weeks of going through things like cold and another new-fangled type of weather called snow. It would be nice to be in the land of eternal summer, but at the same time its part of the changes I’ve had to get used to the past couple of months since my moving here.

September is almost over, geez, that was a blink of an eye. Wasn’t it just my birthday, like in 2009? Time sure flies by and FAST (with a capital F). It was nice speaking to my niece Jujubeans (aka Julie) on her birthday and glad she enjoyed her gifts and it’s good knowing she’s doing well in school.
Nothing major has really happened except for having enjoyed my week off in a very laid-back way. Other than that, go and download that song, it’s one of my favorites.

Monica and the Light Switch

There’s an episode of Friends in which Monica has a light switch and doesn’t know what it turns on/off. Monica destroys the walls of the apartment trying to figure out what it connects to only to never discover that it turns the TV on/off at the next apartment over, which Phoebe believes she controls telekinetically.

I have such a switch. My classroom has four light switches and three of them correspond to the three lighting sectors in the room. But there’s a fourth switch that does nothing, at least nothing I have been able to pinpoint. After my co-teacher asked me if it was okay to turn off some of the lights in my classrooms, I saw it as the perfect opportunity to ask about that fourth switch. Turns out it used to correspond to an older ceiling fan that used to be in the room, which is now replaced by my ceiling A/C unit.

Well this whole week has been about turning on lights for me. After celebrating my birthday here is Songtan with fellow abroad teachers, neighbors, and new friends I have, I used some of the time after that to reflect. A part of me could not believe I wasn’t spending that day with my friends and family back home in LA. I must admit that I got homesick at one point after my festivities were over. Many saw it coming telling me that I would feel “the slump” especially hard on my birthday because it was my first one here and it is parallel to the time of the third month.

After letting that soak in and being grateful for the wishes and the fact that I actually did have fun on my birthday I then reflected more on the things that used to ease my stress. I used to do a lot of things back to vent out any frustrations I had that made me who I am. Well this week I’ve started tapping into that person again.

It’s like when you stop going to gym and hate the idea of going back, but when you do, you remind yourself of why you did it in the first place. With that said, I’ve started running again, did it three times this week (aren’t you just proud?). I had let myself forget how freeing running can be and how putting on a good jam on in the iPod can make a run go from good to great. I seriously can’t wait for nighttime to get to go run, and plus it helps me discover parts of Songtan I’ve overlooked before.

I’ve also gotten into writing. I don’t mean just writing for this blog, but writing in other forms. I actually used to write into MS Word documents like crazy all the time. I’m back to that habit. Especially as I’m currently reading Timbuktu by Paul Auster, which tells the story of a now-homeless man who is on the brink of death but ever since he was a teenager he was infatuated with writing and literature. As I’m currently working through this book, I’m glad to say that I could relate to the outlet that is writing and the power it can have.

I guess those are the lights that went off in my head; the switch definitely took some time to find.

P.S. Happy Birthday Week to Nick and Pati! Go Team Virgo!

P.S. Hope you were able to see the metaphor in the last sentence of the second paragraph.

Where Were You?

The title says it all. I'd like to take the time to reflect on 3 major events that took place during my lifetime that have resulted in being in history books, novels, movies, and abundantly in television. I shall start with the oldest first and work my way up.

Where were you when Selena died?

I was coming home from school. I attended Norwood Elementary. When I got home my parents were both there watching television. My mom said "Someone killed Selena." At first I didn't really understand what she had said. "Someone killed who?" I thought. Also the idea that "Someone killed Celia," who is my sister, did cross my mind but was immediately scratched out when I heard the uneventful tone in her voice. Had something happened to my sister it would have been full blown emotion, not just my parents sitting around and watching TV. So when I asked my mom for a second delivery, I finally understood what she meant. The singer of "Bidi Bidi Bom Bom" had passed away because her fan club rep had shot her. And yes, I remember sitting around the television as well joining my parents on the edge of my seat wondering what Yolanda was going to do in that car with the police surrounding her. It was like a thriller movie, intense!

Where were you on the events of September 11, 2001 (aka 9/11)?

It was my seventeenth birthday, but that didn't void me from going to school. In fact, I really wanted to go to school. It was my senior year of high school and birthdays had become a big deal within my circle of friends that year. They included pinatas, going out for movies, and having one friend burn her hair because we rigged her birthday cake with trick candles.
Well I woke up that morning with a little pep in my step because I wanted to see what school would be like on my birthday. In the midst of getting ready my father said, "Someone attacked the World Trade Center." Those words. I was like "....Ok, well that's not good." The words he chose to tell me are what triggered that mundane expression. If you recall sometime before someone had walked into the Twin Towers with a gun but was immediately stopped. So when my father said, "someone attacked," I figured someone walked in with a gun, pocketknife, or some pointy object that could be considered a weapon, that is all.
I got to school only to find that with every classroom I walked by the TV was on and that all the students were glued to it like it was a Magic Eye game. I thought it was perculiar but I still didn't think anything of it and figured that I would find out about what they're watching when I get to class. I got to first period, which was US Government, and long behold, one of the towers had been attacked and it was up in smoke! Crazy! After reading the headlines and overhearing what my classmates were saying, I was all caught up.
I was watching these huge monuments just fall into pieces. I got to second period with a quickness because I didn't want to miss what was happening. This is the class I had with all my friends, Mr. Odegaard's AP English class. It was my birthday for a whomping 5 minutes. It was all "Happy Birthday Oscar! Here are your presents, now back to TV!" I was fine with it though. I got it. How could I possibly think about celebrating my birthday when massive amounts of people are dying because airplanes keep crashing in monumental buildings? One gift I remember getting was a sweater from Heidi and Lizzy which they went to pick out from Anchor Blue and had some guy who was of my same physical demeanor try it on to see how it would look on me, I still have it somewhere in my closet in LA. Anyways, I remember being glued to the TV and watching those towers fall as if they nothing, just a couple of Lego buildings some four year-old was knocking down.
The whole day was like that though. It was just me walking around with my gifts from period to period trying to get my eyes to catch every moment of what was going on. It was AP Calculus and we had a substitute teacher. And yes, my memory about this day is just that detailed. The PA system over the whole campus had announced to the Fremont teachers that the events on the TV were too violent and suggested they'd be turned off. Well our sub didn't give a flying fuck about what the PA said and kept it on as his argument was that we were witnessing history unfold before our very eyes. He was right! Once the events subsided it was Tennis class, but by that time everyone was still getting over that initial shock of what transpired that morning. There was no Tennis class, I went home, had dinner with the family, all the while still being attached to TV like a siamese twin.

Where were you when Michael Jackson died?

It was grad school time and I decided to head to the Starbucks at the Barnes & Nobles near the CSULB campus to get some studying done (the one on 2nd street next to the AMC). I found a table all to myself and as soon as I logged on I noticed that some headlines read about Michael Jackson being in a serious condition. I then raced to Facebook to see if any of my friends had posted anything and about three of them had posted that MJ had died. I was in complete shock. But because I hadn't read anything official from news sites I didn't know whether to find any truth in those status updates. I then decide to go to the website that may very well be the fall of the human race, TMZ. Even though I don't support the paparazzi movement, they seem to know things a lot quicker than CNN and KTLA 5. Sure enough, they had reported that Michael Jackson had died. Still in awe, I hit refresh on those news sites and the headline went from "Critical Condition" to "Passed Away." At that very moment I yelled out for all of Starbucks, its cutomers and employees to hear, "Oh my God, Michael Jackson just died!"
The Baristas then turn to me and one of them said, "Really? He did? I've been getting text messages from friends not knowing if he had died or not." I confirmed to her the information I had gotten from my sources. Then about five minutes later I get a call from my mother (as I was expecting) where she told me she was sad and we then briefly spoke about his passing.

I have a picture from the wall that was made for his memorial service at the Staples Center that now stands in the Nokia Theater in LA. It was signed by those fans who attended the memorial. In utter jelousy that I could not go, I am glad to be next to a piece of musical history.

"In The Midnight Hour, I Can Feel Your Power"

Religion....

This topic, much like the last blog, is the result of a single "tweet" posted not too long ago. This blog could not have come at a better time either. This week marks the week of the Jewish New Year, Rosh Hashanah, and the end of Ramadan in the Islamic faith, Eid. Without thinking about these two monumental holidays in Western culture, my topic this week with my students has been religion, mainly what I call "The Big Three" (Judaism, Christianity, and Islam). I've been teaching them about the family tree and how Abraham, Jesus, and Muhammad are all rooted in the same family tree.

Granted, anyone that knows anything about me knows that I am not religious, like AT ALL. But I must say I do show my respect to those that decide to follow an organized faith and I would never influence their decision, as I hope they would not do the same to me (It's called respect). However, I do know that all the religions offer valuable tidbits in philosophy and humanity. They are all rooted in the same message, a message I follow: Be a good and decent person, if you do something bad, make it right. That's it. That's what I follow. I feel everything will fall into place if you just follow the golden rule.

I also find interest in relgion, and although I may not agree with its organization, I must say that there is much credit that should be given to relgious literature. The Bible, The Torah, and the Qu'Ran are all well written books that paved the way for other works of Western literature. However, current events do not seem to see it that way.

I will say that I have learned a lot from friends in different religions. I learned a lot about Islam from Zorah, a lot about Christianity from Phoebe, and a lot about Judaism from a great teacher, Mrs. Goldman. I have been very priveleged (dare I say blessed?) to have been exposed to an abundance of information that has allowed me not only to learn about, but to have made an informed decision about my faith and believes, as well as tolerate the faiths of others.

This blog not only emerges from my lesson plan for this week, but also from the fact there is much non-tolerance going on in the USA. Because a mosque is being considered as part of the multicultural memorial (emphasis on MULTICULTURAL) of ground zero, people have found it as an excuse to burn Qu'Rans. Some ministers and imams have made outrageous blanket statements that tell me that they should both take a deep breath and to just sit down and have a conversation. It doesn't do anyone any good to hear these supposed religious leaders yell and belt out outrageous statements that make them look bad and should instead have an informed conversation. Also, and a complaint, they need to remind themselves that the basis for their religions is that we are all the children of God (try and remember that please!).

I kind of felt outraged as well when I got an email in my Spam folder. I SOMEHOW (I really have no clue how) got into some email list for the Tea Party (a party of which makes regular Republicans look lenient). Well I usually don't pay attention to my bulk mail, but I must say that the title, "Ground Zero Imam Blows More Smoke Than Sheds Light---Threatens the American People" caught my eye. Yes, that was in the Subject line of the email. I, of course, opened it and read it. After reading it, it made me more outraged and it made me think that once again, the statements said are making the people who are saying them look worse than the group they are opposing. This is a quote direct from that email (no edits) about Muslims:

"They are perennially violent, 24/7. And, is it the responsibility of the rest of the world to examine each action to determine how it will affect this very unstable and violent group of people?
Any Mom can tell you – don’t reward bad behavior!"

Really? Saying Muslims are violent 24/7? No offense but this email sounds like it comes from people who think about violence 24/7. And don't reward bad behavior? This isn't a group of puppies you are trying to train, this is a religious group you are talking about. "Bad Mulims, bad bad Muslims." <-- That's what I imagine them saying. No offense, but no religion, ethnic group, or social class is perfect, and blaming a large group for individual radical actions is just wrong. It's the same crap that's happening with the Arizona immigration laws and the Don't Ask Don't Tell laws in the military. I bet you anything that there were Muslims in those Twin Towers who did not see those airplanes coming. I also bet that not every German during WWII was a law-abiding Nazi. Just ask the protagonist of my favorite movie of all time, Schindler.

Wow, this rant went on a lot longer than expected. The power of a tweet.

Quizzical: A Theory on Fluctuation

So in my 6th period class of freshman on Fridays there is one students in that class that stands out (actually there has always been, in every education-related job that I've had, that one student who stands out). He has this quizzical look on his face for the entire hour. It makes me think that he falls under one of the following two theories:

1- He is very interested and engaged. He knows what's going on, he get's it!

2- He is as lost as lost can be. He has no clue what is going on or even where he is at.

Because he randomly participates in class, it has been very difficult to assess the situation. He, however, is in one of the best classes I have, so I'll give him the benefit of the doubt and say that he knows the lessons.

He is in my last class of the week, one of my best ones. Actually the first class I teach on Mondays and the last class I teach on Fridays are my best ones. Everything else in between just fluctuates. These classes make me look forward to coming to work in the beginning of the work week and get me pumped for the weekend. Again, everything in between is like a Richter scale.

This has definitely been the feeling this week. In the middle of having the FES come in, being in the midst of losing my voice (and therefore teaching with a microphone for 2 days), and acknowledging that my birthday is tomorrow, it's been up and down. I'm that kid. I don't know if I understand this week with impecable comprehension, or if I don't know where I am or what's going on. I'm very much looking forward to next week (and this wekeend also). Maybe next week I'll be the category of the first theory.

Whomp, there it is!

The feeling is here. Woah, I feel it in my gut. What finally caused the three month feeling? Four students in my school, that's what.

Our foreign exhange students came in today to meet everyone. They don't start classes until Thursday, but they came in to get to know the school area. I saw them at our daily morning teacher's meeting. They introduced themselves in English and Korean.

That didn't do it for me. But it was nice to see these students I've heard so much about in the past several weeks.

What did it for me was when I was getting coffee from the English teacher's room (kind of like our teacher's lounge, but for English teachers) and saw them all sitting on the couches there. They were talking to the other teachers in the room, I greeted them and then I sat down to talk to them as well. As soon as that first question, or commentary, or whatever it was exited my mouth, I felt it. I was them 3 months ago. I was right there where they were sitting being asked some of the same questions about myself, my home, my background, etc.

I was just like "woah, there it is, in my gut!" It's so funny because I was having dinner last night with a couple of friends and I mentioned how the day before had been three months since my arrival to South Korea and how I didn't feel new anymore, especially that I now have met people who have been here less time I have. But that was all I really felt.

But talking to these kids, seeing their eyes looking back, I felt like I was them. Yeah, I'm older, but they're kind of on the same boat as I am. They're here for a year, they have a lot to learn, they want to be here, they see it as a great opportunity, their families and friends are excited for them, and they plan to make the most out of the experience. It was like looking at the 17 year old version of myself (I don't know if that makes sense or not). I just saw them sitting there, having to meet an abundance of people, and getting to know the campus. Yep, I could completely relate.

I was happy when the French students were impressed with the amount of French I knew. I had to backtrack to my middle school French class, which has the most God-awful teacher, but I will give her credit that I learned a lot and it stuck. 3 out of the 4 speak impeccable English, which is great.

So here it is. Today is Monday, so it's my best day out of my work-week as I only teach two periods on Mondays. Maybe that will help make me feel better. Yet again, I have a lot of free time, that's a lot of time inside my own head.

I should've brought that book that's in my room to read!

It's Time....For The Hills

Well folks, the time has come. The dreaded three month slump that everyone is supposed to suffer from that affects foreign teachers in South Korea was supposed to strike me today. Maybe mine is belated, I'll have to check on it's arrival. I didn't really feel it. Today marks my 3rd month in SK. Go figure. Maybe because I've talked to my family in extensive lengths in the very recent past. That always helps.

I must say that if something is bad about this day it's the heat. Granted it's dry heat, so that's a plus, dry heat just like back home. Went to the farmer's market today (love farmer's markets, nothing beats the one is Seattle), and it was hot as Hades. Found a shirt, I didn't buy food, probably because I didn't go shopping hungry (a common consumer mistake). It wasn't too hot for that, that area is pretty well shaded, so no problems there. But it's too hot to do other stuff outdoors. I have the A/C running while I'm at home. I pressed my hand against the window to see how hot it was outside, scorching!

So yeah, 3 months, who'd a thunk it? At least the third month is in fact the best month in the calender year ever! (just ask Pati and Nick)

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Now for "The Hills" segment of this blog. This is based on the following conversation a couple of weeks ago:

Me - "Isn't it funny some people here think that the life in your hometown is just like they see it on TV?"

Susanna - "I know. They think that because I'm from New York that I'm from New York City. I feel like they can't differentiate between New York the state and New York the city. Upstate New York is very different from what they see on TV."

Me- "They probably think your life back home was like Sex and the City."

Susanna- "Yeah."

Me- "They probably also think my life is like The Hills because I'm from LA. That my life is just going out at night and talking about it the next day."

Susanna- "Oscar, that is your life."

Me- "Oh yeah."

The Question and the Typhoon

So in my last blog about this venture out with my coworkers I forgot to mention one thing. There was a question floating about with my fellow teachers and it went like this.

"So we want to know, because we all really like you, are you going to renew your contract?"

Then I heard a record scratch, and I think time paused for a while. My response was in all honesty what I actually think about the situation: I don't know. I did say to myself at one point that if things didn't turn around back in the USA, or if things went really well in SK that I wouldn't mind staying another year. But I'm barely going into month three so I really don't know. I can't speak for how the other nine months are going to go let alone any time after that. What I am sure about is the fact that I'm going home sometime in the winter and that I would return in the summer too. Anything after that is a big question mark. I, however, would never stay for more that 2 years. You see, I have a California teaching credential, and if I were to stay in SK for more than 2 years then my credential would expire. I wouldn't allow myself to let that happen because it would seem like a waste of both tuition and three semesters at LBSU.

So now time can unpause and we can return to our regularly scheduled lives.

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There is such a thing as weather. Back in LA we have one season: summer. Here in South Korea, not only do they have seasons (plural), but they also have these disturbing and annoying things called typhoons, who knew?

Well this typhoon woke me up in the middle of the night, caused a blackout, had me get ready and eat breakfast in the dark, appreciate that electricity was running at work, then have it go away only to have to teach two periods without my beloved technology, and then have it come back on to have things going as usual. That's some powerful weather.

My co-teacher said SK hadn't had a typhoon in some years, so it was overdue. I guess I can relate as the same can be said for eathquakes back home. I remember he told me when I first got here that this summer's humidity was the worst in had been in some years too. Well la-di-da, lucky me.

In a constant effort to find things that make me laugh, you can enjoy this:

Disclaimer: I actually think Kesha's music is okay.

See more funny videos and funny pictures at CollegeHumor.