After I heard some news last night, I turned off the TV, went back and forth in my thoughts of condolence and not believing what had happened. I eventually found my way of dealing with these types of truths in a way I'm used to dealing with them, by losing myself in work. I came across my TED app and browsed through their Technology section as I normally do. I have a fascination with TED Talks, and my students love watching their talks, so I try to include them in lessons when I find them fitting. After evaluating some of the talks for my class, I wandered and browsed through their featured section.
One of the talks highlighted was about death, a talk given by Stephen Cave. I clicked on it and proceeded to watch it. I noted from the talk that our behaviors change when we remind ourselves that our own deaths are imminent. It becomes a point of obsession for children who first realize that they are to face the same fate someday. This point Cave made about being a child himself and thinking of death just prompted a reminder that I just watched My Girl with Yaya, an ongoing theme in the film. I have my beliefs of what happens to us when we depart, but the physical me has unknowns that the faithful me does its best to reassure. After the talk, I found out the next morning of my friends' loss.
While looking at this time as I time when my friends both need to be surrounded by loved ones and need to be left alone, I lay here thinking about the good times we had. The good times I've had with them, their family, and the father they just lost bring me joy. He was a man who enjoyed being surrounded by family and friends, and liked to see people enjoy themselves, too.
It led me to think about some of the celebrations in my life, and how it is those celebrations that make our inevitable fate worth it. Just this past weekend I got to have dinner with my siblings, which doesn't happen too often because of our commitments, but when it does I do enjoy it to the fullest. That is where my train of thought has led too, making sure I treasure the moments here as much as I can with those who are by my side.
One of my favorite quotes comes from Alanis Morissette, whom I just saw speak at the Arclight, and I find the quote fitting for the circumstances. It says that "as we grow older, things become less and less precious and more and more sacred."
Though I know the realities of me facing this time are unavoidable, I cannot imagine what my friends are going through. Like I told them, I just want them to know that I'm reachable and there without hesitation.
Rest in peace Mr. Abel, thank you for taking care of us every time you had us over.
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